Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Super Groupie

Have I ever mentioned that I'm a Groupie??

I am.

At least as far as some of my favorite bloggers go. I feel like they're the amazing fantastical creatures who are so much cooler than I am and I get amazingly excited over the stupidest shit, like:

Did you know that Candance knows my name??

So imagine the Groupiegasm I had when I got an email from Aunt Crazy last month asking if me & Miley wanted to go to the Symphony with her.


I mean I know that Miley's all kinds of cool, and everybody loves her.

But ME?!?!?!

Holy fuck. What does one wear when meeting a RAWKstar??

I have no fucking clue. But I wore a dress. Because Miley wanted me to wear a dress. And black stockings because I'm a Southern girl and we cover our legs in public.
And heels.

However, I forgot to take into account how much I've been slumming it at work for the last 6 months in my jeans and tennis shoes and occassionally flats.

Nine months ago I could have run to the Symphony in heels (or at least I could have just as well as in tennis shoes). And when I put the bitches on they felt fine.

And then we walked. And y'all, Miley is TALL. So she walks fast. I'm not. So even in flats sometimes its hard to keep up with her. Plus, I'm an asthmatic smoker. I'm slow.

We were way early so we sat outside and smoked and talked (or at least Miley & Aunt Crazy talked - I listened trying to pretend like I was just like the other cool kids) and I got to rest my screaming feet.

Then we went in.

Y'all, I almost busted my ass. I'm walking in behind Miley looking for our seats and shit, and I hit that ramp down into the chairs and almost went Jill on everybody.

Miley and Aunt Crazy weren't looking at me, so I did the only thing I could think of.

I took off my shoes. At the symphony.

I know.. I KNOW.. My grandmother would have killed me.

But the good news is, I don't think Aunt Crazy noticed.

Anyway. Good symphony. Aunt Crazy liked it and Miley & I took turns distracting each other..

Miley: Jenn.

Me: ??

Miley: The bass player is talking to his bass!!

Me: No, he's counting..

For the record, Miley was right. He was talking to his bass. I know because I was attempting to read his lips for the rest of the concert.

And later..

Me: Miley.

Miley: ??

Me: That second horn is really brassy don't you think??

Miley: ?????

What can I say, I'm not as amusing as Miley is..

Anyway. Good times were had by all. I fully intend to enthusiastically accept if I ever get another invitation from Aunt Crazy, and I may even prod Miley into inviting her out with us (because I am far too chicken shit to do it myself).


Miley said...

I walk fast? Really? In HEELS? It must be because of the long legs... and the part where those damn shoes were trying to rip the skin off my entire heel.

Apparently you were too busy trying to fall that you didn't notice that I almost busted my ass AND flashed everyone getting into my seat.

and yes, we definitely need to get Aunt Crazy out with us more. I think a party at MY HOUSE is in order :D

Miley said...

oh, and I would have noticed that the 2nd horn was brassy had I not been distracted by the 2nd clarinet being a tad sharp. Just sayin'.

Probably a good thing Glass canceled. He wouldn't have known what to do with the 3 of us.

Leiah said...

Y'all are cracking me up! The first time Aunt C & I met, Uncle Bubba kept texting her to see if 1) I really was a man, and 2) if I was a psycho or not. I shit you not. Next time y'all get together, can I go to? Or better yet, y'all make Aunt C take y'all to my neck of the woods and we'll hit up the casinos. Everyone's welcome in the Bayou!

Aunt Crazy said...

That's why y'all need to get some hooker boots, easy to walk in and no pain!

I had a great time, even though I am symphony illiterate. I did get an A on my paper though, so thanks for going with me.

We definitely need to get together again soon, it was so much fun!!!

bluzdude said...

Miley's just making up for lost time now that she got her leg out of the cast.

I'm sure your Grandma would rather you take off your heels than fall ass over elbows down the aisle.