The grocery store.
Yeah, doesn't sound very threatening, does it.
But in my house, one trip to the grocery store is cause for an assload of tension and guilt trips.
Mom is supposed to take care of the grocery shopping, but she's a mediocre shopper at best.
She never looks to see what we need. And if I make a list, she doesn't look for it, or if she does, she leaves it at home.
Usually she comes home with chips and cookies, and maybe some fruit if I'm lucky.
But no meat. No onions. No rice or diced tomatoes. Nothing you would actually use to cook a meal.
The kids started back to school on Tuesday. And Mondays are supposed to be Family Nights when Bean's off. But Monday, I got home from work and she hadn't gone to the grocery store yet, because Tallulah didn't want to go and she was waiting for someone to get home.
It's now 4:30 and she's not looking like she's moving. The kids go to bed at 8:00.
Me: Ok.. so you're going to take Oliver?
Me: Umm.. tonight is family dinner night, Mom.
Me: So, we have nothing to make for dinner (because you haven't been to the grocery store in a month) and while we could go out, I would need Oliver for that. So are you going to go?
Mom: Jeez!! I didn't know I had to go before you got home!!
There was absolutely nothing to gain in pointing out that she didn't. But she couldn't take Oliver with her if she expected me to be pleased with her waiting.
Me: Why don't we just go this week?
Mom: I'm going!!
I can't win for losing.
See, my Mom may at times seem to be lazy, and she's often the sweetest woman you've ever met. But unless you have no heart, don't make the mistake of trying to do battle with her.
She's the Queen of the Guilt Trip, and the Mistress of Manipulation. Even though I know I'm being manipulated and guilt tipped, it doesn't matter. My mediocre will crumbles before the onslaught of the expressive sighs and multi-layered meanings.
I can't help it.
Bean asked me today if I want to move.
In some ways the answer to that is an enthusiastic
But I can't. I'm tied. With the bonds of love.