Saturday, August 21, 2010

Saint Bean

I alluded to this a bit yesterday bu today you're getting the full story.

Thursday, Bean was sharpening Tallulah's pencils for Supply Drop-off Night,

All 3 Million of them.

Perry walked by.

Keep in mind, we are all in Bean and My house.

Our house.

Not Perry's house.

The house that Perry chose not to live in anymore when he chose not to work on our marriage anymore.

The house that he knew I would bodily throw him out of when he busted out that obelisk that broke the camel's back of our marriage.

The one that Bean moved into.

The one that Bean has made into a home again.

That's the house we were in.

So he walks by Bean sharpening 3 million of his daughter's pencils to take to school and he says:

So you finally found a job suited to your education level?

I'll wait while you pick your jaw up off the floor.

I'll wait a little longer while you sputter and cuss.

Bean didn't hit him.

I didn't hit him. Or yell at him, or back him into a corner and have him begging me to stop berating him within an inch of his life. (I've done that to him before, and I'm only using a little hyperbole).

Though if you can picture Bean bodily holding me, while my feet kicked uselessly at the air and my hands morphed into claws, you're not far off.

Neither of us said a fucking word.

But you know what, Perry??

Don't ask me for gas money again.


bluzdude said...

Honestly, I can't believe you let him anywhere NEAR your house. And Bean is totally a saint. I can't conceive of a scenario where I'd accept my wife's ex-husband living with us.

I know there's something to be said for keeping things civil for the kids sake, but I think this is above and beyond the call.

And what kind of sociopath WANTS to stay with his ex-wife and her saintly husband? I mean, grow some self-respect!

Ok, Ok, your life... This is me, butting back out.

As you were...

Judie said...

Hmmmm. Sounds like someone has a lot of growing up to do. Sounds like someone is childishly jealous. Sounds like someone needs a punch in the mouth, and a restraining order slapped on him.

woman:confused said...

Bluz, lol, he doesn't LIVE there! He comes for his visitation.

Jenn - this coming from a man who is too much of a fucking pussy to take his certification tests and who spent a BAGILLION years in college just to make what he made BEFORE getting his degree because he won't get certified?
Oh yea... I would be beating the shit outta him.

cathyjoy said...

way to be the grown-up!

Candance said...

Dude, he would've been extracting one of those newly sharpened pencils from his balls. Just sayin'.

He asked you for gas money? Seriously?

What. an. ass.

Christy said...

I think they would have had to perform surgery to extract my fingernails from his eyes.

Sara said...

I think you did the right thing.

If you had responded defensively, he wouldn't been all, "Geez, can't take a joke?" and if you'd laughed at it, he would've thought it was okay.

Your response was perfect. I mean, I hope someone gave him some serious stink eye, but unforgiving silence can often put one's bowels in a twist.

Sarah R said...

What a dumbass!!! I guess he knows how good he had it when he was with you and he's jealous of Bean. I'm sorry!!! I wouldn't have been able to keep my mouth shut.

Aunt Crazy said...

He sounds like an absolute douchebag! I'll hate him for you, so you don't have to use your energy doing it...LOL

Oh and may the fleas of 1000 camels infest his armpits and pubic hair!!!